20X20

Hello, what's your name and how many cigarettes do you smoke a day?

Hello, my name is Abby Kim and…

Wow, full name?

You want my legal name? (laughs) Abigail Song Kim. I normally smoke around three to four times a day. Depends.

What depends? What makes it three or four?

On a day I don't have as many classes, probably a little bit less. Just because I feel like the act of going outside… I'm just kind of lazy.

So the more classes you have, the more you smoke?

Yes.

Logical… and did you know smoking one cigarette deducts 20 minutes of your lifespan?

I didn't before you told me a few weeks ago… Well, I obviously knew it did shorten it to some extent, but I didn't know it was 20 minutes.

So why do you smoke? Kind of sounds like a weird question, but that's the whole point of the interview, you know?

Yeah, I got you. Um, I would say mostly that… it's kind of ingrained in my routine, a decent amount. I've been kind of addicted to nicotine since sophomore year of high school.

Did you start with vaping or cigarettes?

I started with vaping, and that kind of started as like, "Oh, my friends are doing it." I tried it, not thinking that it would lead to six years of this, but…

Do you feel like being at our school, where a lot of students smoke, and it also being in the city makes you smoke more?

The chances of smoking definitely increase. I mean… I think I'm at a point now where it's been better than a couple of years ago, where I can just, like, stop if I really wanted to. I know that a lot of people say, "Oh, I can stop whenever I want," but I have done it before in the past, which kind of gives me some insurance about it. But being around friends who smoke does make it more convenient and more of like a, "Yeah, I'll do that."

Do you think you smoke because of your friends and the people you're around, or is it past that point where you just do it to take a break or whatever?

I think the accessibility has to do with my friends smoking, like, a decent amount. Like, when we're on a break, you and I will go outside, and we both have several friends who do, too. So that's definitely part of it. But also, it's a huge stress reliever and almost a crutch.

Yeah. Do you like listening to music when you smoke?

Oh, yeah, always. It's like part of the experience for me.

What song do you think you listen to the most when you smoke?

Probably "Lavender Buds" by MF DOOM. It just puts me in this really chill, hazy vibe that makes smoking feel even better. The beat is so mellow, it kind of slows everything down for me.

That makes sense. So even if you were smoking alone, it wouldn't feel as empty?

Yeah, exactly. I think it fills the space in a way. Like, even when I smoke with people, we're usually listening to something anyway.

Yeah, I get that. Do you think you'll keep smoking even after you graduate? Like, if you end up in a corporate job where people also take smoke breaks? Or do you have a goal for quitting?

I don't know if I have a specific goal. It's definitely something I don't wanna do for the rest of my life. I think all the time, if I had never started, would I be doing it now? So there is a definite kind of future goal to quit. I'm conscious of it, but also, like… I don't know exactly. We'll see.

Yeah. I hope we can all quit by the time we're looking at this website or something, like, 10 years later. Saying, "Oh, yeah, I fucking quit."

(laughs) I thought you were talking about the final critique.

No, no, no—(loud car honk) Damn, they really had to ruin it like that.

Can you include that in the interview? (laughing) That's gonna be so funny.

(coughs)

But yeah, besides it being a stress reliever, it's also just a nice way to, like, take a break. Especially if we're in a three-hour class, we just go outside and chill for a bit. I don't have to think about my projects at that moment.

Oh, so do you think you stop thinking when you smoke? Because I feel like some people use it as a break to actually think more. Like, they step away from their work, and while they're not physically in front of it, they're thinking about it more clearly.

I mean, for me, I get to take a step back as if I'm not the one designing the things I'm designing. It helps me look at things from an outside perspective instead of being glued to my screen 24/7. I just get to, like, think plainly about it, if that makes sense.

So I guess we gotta have no stress for us to quit.

Oh my God. Don't say that shit, man. That's awful.

(laughs) Never mind. Alright, I'm cutting it here—we're done.

Hello, what's your name and how many cigarettes do you smoke a day?

So my name is Diego Bonilla Gross and I think I smoke around three cigarettes a day.

Three? That's average. Um… did you know that actually one cigarette equals 20 minutes of your life, like in a lifespan wise?

I actually did know that, I saw that recently.

You did?

Yeah.

But actually for us because we're men it's 17 minutes, for women it's 22 minutes, so the average is 20 minutes but the reality is 17 for us.

Mmm… that sucks.

So you know, you know that it shortens your lifespan so why do you still do it?

Damn… I enjoy it, it keeps me calm. I feel like it levels me out when I'm stressed. Also, as a student, I feel like it's a little break from my work. Like I come back to my work with a fresher mind.

But don't think that applies after student life too, though, like you going into a corporation is gonna be like, lowkey in a similar environment where hella people still smoke in your job and then you're gonna be like, oh, I'll take a break with you.

(laughs) Imma hope not. Imma hope not. I hope that after college I quit. That's the plot I have behind it.

You think being in like, specifically our school, matters a lot? like, defines that we smoke a lot in our school. Especially outside of the school, you know. I don't feel like it's really normal, like, I would go to Rutgers University or some other school to see nobody smoking.

I would definitely say there's a school influence behind it because like all Parsons students will smoke one I say. I feel like if you don't smoke a cigarette, then it's kind of like you're left out in a weird way. Also everyone wants that, like the New York aesthetic, yeah (laughs).

So, you think being in our school affects it; does it mean that you just want to socialize mostly while, or the other way?

Yeah, I would smoke to socialize, but it's also just like a break, I don't know. I smoke for a break.

So you would only smoke when you're doing work, or like, would you also smoke to just, like, break from anything?

No, I only smoke when I'm doing work, honestly. Okay, doing work and possibly when you're drunk? Oh, when I'm drunk, too. But it's also a break, you're taking a break from drinking. It's a break from drinking.

So when you take a break from work and smoke, do you think a lot when you smoke, or do you just be like, oh, like damn near mindless?

I'm pretty mindless when I'm smoking, cause I don't really wanna think about my work. I kind of just want to step back from it. And I feel like if I'm thinking about my work, I'm still in the mind of being in the studio instead of being out of it.

So it's like you feel like you're still working if you think about it?

If I think about it, it's not really a break if I'm thinking about it… you know what I'm saying?

Yeah. But like, if you're not socializing like doing it with multiple people in a group or whatever, do you like listening to music while you do it or anything? Or do you just like white noise?

I would definitely say music. I definitely like to listen to music while I smoke outside. I'd rather smoke alone actually. It just feels better that way and plus it's kind of weird to listen to music while you're smoking and talking to others.

Makes sense. Is there a typical genre or a song that you like listening to?

Nah, my music tastes really bipolar. It's gonna be like Clairo once a second, then like Glokk40Spaz the next second. All smoking one.

But if you need to pick one song what is it. that you can listen to anytime. Like mid class, mid… i don't know… anything, mid fucking, mid after fucking, mid working, mid sleeping.

Bryson Tiller's Don't (laughs).

Bryson Tiller's Don't (laughs)... You okay with this being in the interview that you like listening to Don't?

Don't (hums)

Okay, alright. Do you have anything else to say (laughing).

Stay smoking, take as many breaks as you want, as many cigarettes as you want, and I feel like a good break is always good here and there.

Hello, what's your name and how many cigarettes do you smoke a day?

My name is Mark Li. I usually smoke like eight to ten cigarettes a day.

Eight to ten? Okay. Did you know that every cigarette shortens your life by 20 minutes?

Yeah, I guess… I think I lost like five years of life already.

Five years of life?

Yeah, I think I lost like five years of life already because of smoking in the past few years.

But did you know it was exactly 20 minutes, or did you just have a rough idea that it shortens your life?

Yeah, I just had a rough idea, not the specific number.

I mean, everyone knows smoking is unhealthy, right? Do you think you have a reason why you still smoke?

Yeah… I think I just can't quit because it's like mental support. Whenever I feel low or wake up in the morning, the first thing I wanna do is smoke. It's become part of my life already, and it's not that easy. Personally, I don't feel like it's causing any health issues for me right now, so I'm not thinking about quitting.

So you don't see it in front of your face, basically.

Yeah, yeah.

Makes sense. When did you first start smoking?

I started smoking when I was twelve or thirteen.

Twelve or thirteen? (laughs) Why did you start so young?

I was just… not happy. Family reasons. I was going through a hard time, so I started smoking.

Did you buy it yourself, or did someone get it for you?

In China, if you're twelve or thirteen, you just walk into a cigarette shop and ask for cigarettes, and they'll sell them to you. It's not a big deal there.

Holy shit, what?

Yeah.

Since you're in the city for school, do you think being here makes it even harder to quit? Like, with how many people smoke in the city and at our school?

Yes, definitely. Back home, I'd say 70% of the population smokes, so it's really normal there. And in the city, when I'm outside school, I see so many people smoking, so I'm like, "Why should I quit? Everyone is smoking."

Do you think smoking is a good way to socialize? Like, does it help you make friends?

Definitely, definitely. I've made so many friends just sitting in front of the school smoking, sparing cigarettes for people, and just starting conversations. It's a good way to meet people.

A lot of people I talk to say they smoke for social reasons, or because it gives them time to think. It's like a break.

Yeah, I totally agree. My favorite thing during class breaks is smoking.

Do you think smoking makes you think better? Like, since you're not sitting in front of your work, does it help clear your head?

I mean, it gives you a break, but you can do other things to take a break. It doesn't have to be smoking. But for me, smoking is the best thing that works.

Yeah, for sure. Do you listen to music when you smoke?

Yeah, if I'm not talking to someone while I smoke, I'll definitely be listening to music.

So you smoke like eight to ten cigarettes a day, right? How many of those are alone?

Probably like five to six times, I smoke alone. The rest, I smoke with my roommate or friends at school.

So about half the time, you prefer smoking alone?

Yes.

Is there a favorite song or genre you like listening to when you smoke?

Yeah, I always listen to jazz or pop music, but mostly jazz.

Do you have one song you listen to the most?

"Autumn in New York." I listen to it a lot. I love it.

Do you think the song enhances the experience, or does it just help you calm down?

It helps me calm down.

Okay, okay. Are you done with your cigarette right now?

Yeah, I smoke fast.

(laughs) Okay, any last words?

Nope, I'm good. Maybe I'll smoke another one.

Hello, what's your name and how many cigarettes do you smoke a day?

Yeah, my name is Alex, and I smoke nearly half a pack, so around seven to ten every day.

Did you know that statistically, one cigarette shortens your life by 20 minutes?

Yeah, yeah, I know. That's pretty romantic. You choose a way to harm yourself, and it's controllable.

Yeah, definitely. You think it's fully controllable?

Yeah. Like, every time I fly back to China to visit my mom, I barely smoke. Last vacation, I went nearly a week without smoking. If I really wanted to keep that up, I could. I nearly quit cigarettes. But New York is such an unhealthy place. I can't stop myself from smoking here.

So you know it harms you, and you think you have the control to stop anytime—so why do you think you still end up smoking seven to ten a day?

Oh, because I'm still young, and Elon Musk is developing mighty science.

What? (laughs)

Yeah. Like, if I get cancer in 30 years, or some incurable disease from smoking, I feel like by then, I'll be able to replace myself with ChatGPT or something.

You think there'll be technology that basically keeps you alive? (laughs)

Yeah, yeah. There will be a solution.

Okay. So do you prefer smoking alone or with people?

I like smoking alone more. But smoking with people… it's funnier. But smoking with people makes me do it twice as much.

Oh, really? So let's say you smoke ten cigarettes a day—how many are alone, and how many with people?

It depends. On a school day, I'd say 70%—like six or seven—are with classmates. The rest—two or three—I'll smoke at home. I don't feel like I need to smoke that much, though.

You said you prefer smoking alone. When you do, do you listen to music, or do you just sit in silence?

Yeah, I listen to music. And I look out my window—just taking in the scene or whatever.

Is there one song you listen to over and over?

Yeah, I usually listen to rap, or sometimes lofi hip-hop girl study music.

Do you have one specific song you like more than the others?

Yeah—there's a song from a Chinese label called Red Label called "Recognize Me" by Mengzi.

Why do you like that one so much?

It reminds me of the days I wasn't smoking. It talks about struggle and pressure, and it reminds me of high school. It's such a huge contrast—I'm listening to it now, and I'm no longer dealing with those same worries. But yeah.

So when you smoke, do you think a lot, or do you just try not to think at all?

When I'm already thinking a lot, I tend to smoke. But when I'm smoking, it kind of comforts my ceiling.

Your ceiling? (laughs)

Yeah. It helps me feel normal. It doesn't fully stop me from thinking, but it helps me think less.

So it's kind of like a way to accompany your thoughts? (laughs)

Yeah, yeah.

Okay, do you have anything else you wanna tell people?

Let me think… Try Chinese cigarettes. They're so much fucking better than American ones.

Any brand you recommend?

Yeah—there's something called HEHUA—it's called Lotus, like Lily flower. Try that one, it's my favorite.

Hello, what's your name and how many cigarettes do you smoke a day?

I'm Jenny, and I usually smoke about five to six cigarettes a day.

You're fucking lying. You sure it's not eight? Eight to ten?

Um… Well, yeah, eight to ten (laughs). But like when I'm not in school, I smoke like four to five. When I'm in school, it's eight to ten.

So, did you know that you lose 20 minutes per cigarette? Actually, 22 for women. So you're losing 220 minutes of your life every day.

I'm glad, dude.

(laughs)

I don't want… I'm enjoying this.

So did you start with vaping first or cigarettes?

I've been smoking since middle school. Like, seventh grade. I smoked cigarettes because in Korea it wasn't normal to vape at the time. I was basically smoking for two years and then everyone found out. They all called me a bitch. So I quit for a year, but I ended up relapsing (laughs).

When you were in eighth grade?

Yeah.

So why do you still smoke? It's been like six years, right?

Yeah. Um… I think I formed an addiction, and it makes me feel good. Like, for me, from a young age, I learned to release my stress through cigarettes. I was really fucking stressed about multiple things… and me being so young, I thought smoking would be a great solution. And honestly, it did make me feel better.

So do you smoke to take breaks in school? I feel like a lot of people at work and school take breaks by smoking.

Well, now that I have a vape, I don't have to, but I just end up smoking a lot of cigarettes too because most people at our school do. So in school… I end up taking breaks with like a group of eight people, and we all smoke together.

Yeah, I get that. Do you think a lot when you smoke, or do you just zone out?

I mean, yeah. I'm very aware that I'm smoking because the nicotine is hitting my lungs, right? So I'm aware of that, but I don't think, like, "I should quit" while I'm smoking. But after? A few minutes later, when I start feeling that strong nausea, I think to myself, "Maybe I should quit. Or at least smoke less."

So let's say you take a break in school and smoke. Are you thinking about school, or are you trying not to think at all?

I think I do think about school.

Some people say smoking helps them organize their thoughts. Like, when you're not in front of your computer, you're still mentally working through stuff. Obviously, for people in Communication Design, they're always on their laptop. But since you're in Fine Arts, I guess you're always in front of a canvas or something. Do you feel like smoking lets you step back and see things differently?

Yeah. I mean, for example, painting—the more you stare at your own painting, the worse it starts to look. That's usually when I know it's time for a break.

So smoking kind of helps you reset?

Yeah, but I also feel like that can just be an excuse to smoke. Like, instead of saying "I need a break" I'll just say "I need a cigarette." But when I do take that break, I try not to think about work. I kind of force myself to put my mind somewhere else. Just focus on the cigarette.

Do you smoke alone a lot, or only with people? Some people only smoke when they drink, or just to socialize.

I mean, that's part of it, but I do smoke alone a lot. I'll go outside of my room two or three times a day just to smoke by myself. And at school, I obviously smoke with people—that's how I socialize.

Do you listen to music when you smoke? I know it's more common when you're alone, since you can't just share earbuds with someone at school.

Oh yeah, I love smoking while listening to music. It makes it taste better. And honestly, it makes me more vulnerable to myself. Like, when I'm alone, listening to music and smoking, I start talking to myself. I think about what's wrong, what's stressing me out… and I just smoke it away with music. It's really healing for me, which is weird because these are killing me.

Do you have a specific song you always go to when you smoke?

Not really. It depends on my mood, but I definitely don't listen to loud party music. I like chill, ambient stuff (laughs).

If you had to choose one?

Probably "Princeton Review" by Team Sleep. I think it's one of those songs that makes a cigarette taste the best ever. Oh, and I love the lyrics.

I'll definitely listen to it after I stop recording… any last words?

Go listen to the song while smoking and let me know if you agree with me (laughs).

Hello, what's your name and how many cigarettes do you smoke a day?

My name is Luke, and right now I'm smoking anywhere from ten to sixteen cigarettes a day.

Ten to sixteen? Holy shit, you just beat everyone (laughs).

(laughs) I just be smoking all the damn time, man.

Okay, so did you know that statistically, you lose around 17 minutes per cigarette for men and 22 minutes for women?

I have heard a similar statistic before, so yes.

And do you really care about that?

Sure, I care about it. I care about a lot of things. But I think the pros outweigh the cons.

Yeah, there's nobody who smokes who doesn't already know it's unhealthy.

Yeah, it's an active choice.

So what do you think is your biggest reason—or like, your greatest pro behind smoking?

I don't carry a watch, so sometimes I don't check the time very often. I think as I've gotten older, cigarettes have become like a ritual—they keep my mind on a different kind of clock. One about pleasure and breaks. So in that way, it's like a reward system. And it's also just that I like having something to do with my hands. I like to… I like to be waiting for something. Always. I like knowing that whenever I'm done doing what I'm doing—whether I like it or not—there's a cigarette to be smoked in my future. I enjoy that feeling.

It's almost like a built-in break in class.

Yeah, yeah. I just pull it out whenever I need it, and it takes me away from whatever moment I'm in. Sometimes in a good way, sometimes in a bad way. But I think, in general, it's just a break in my life.

Okay, so since our school is in the city and most of the students here either smoke or have been smoking for a while, do you think that encourages you to smoke even more?

Just being around people that are already smoking?

Yeah, and also as a way to socialize. Like, in every class, there's always a group of people taking smoke breaks together.

Yeah, totally. I think that's another pro I didn't even mention, one that I don't think about enough. The social aspect of it. It's like drinking. It's like anything else you do socially—it's a common goal between people, and it just feels natural. And I think people want things like that.

Yeah, definitely. So you said you smoke ten to sixteen times a day.

Somewhere around there, yeah.

So how many times do you smoke alone?

See, that's the thing. That's why my number varies so much. If I'm not really doing much all day, I'll smoke like eight cigarettes alone. Which is… I prefer to smoke by myself for sure. But when I'm around other people? Man, if there's beer involved, you bet I'll smoke a whole damn pack. I'll smoke the whole damn thing, and it won't mean shit to me (laughs). Because of that, I prefer smoking alone—it feels more like a conscious decision.

Yeah, I get that (laughs).

And I just enjoy it more by myself. But other people definitely bring it out in me. That's when I really need something to do with my hands. You know what I'm saying? That's when I really feel the need to fidget, the need to whip something out, put something in my mouth. It's just a fixation. And I'm totally fine with that.

So when you smoke alone, do you usually think a lot, or do you try to clear your mind?

Life's been good recently, so every time I smoke, it feels like a celebration. You know when you pull a cold glass of water? That's how smoking feels to me. I always drink something cold when I smoke—I always have some kind of liquid with me. But to answer your question, smoking doesn't really provoke me to get deep in thought. I just think about whatever I was already thinking about. It doesn't bring anything out of me that wasn't already there. It's more like… it gives me a reason to go outside, sit down, and just do what I gotta do.

Yeah, do you usually listen to music when you smoke alone?

I don't like to. I will if I'm at school or if I was already listening to music, but in general, I prefer not to. That's one thing that actually does make me think a little more. When I'm smoking alone, I tend to think about all the other potential distractions I could have. One of those is music. So I usually don't listen to anything—it's just a natural moment.

Yeah, I totally get that.

But I do have one song I end up listening to a lot when I smoke—"Moscow Old School" by Bad Balance. It's this early 90s Russian hip-hop track. It's talking about Moscow, about Russia, about partying and living in a big city like that. I just love that song. It's really melodic and kind of puts me in a certain headspace.

So you feel like that's a song that sits in the background without disrupting the process?

Yeah, yeah. It kind of changes my vibe a little. It's pretty spunky, like a pretty happy song, so it gets me into this on-edge feeling, in a good way. I just feel good when I listen to that song. And if that's paired with a cigarette? That's a beautiful thing.

(laughs) Yeah, do you have anything more to say about smoking?

I think the biggest thing that allows me to keep smoking is my fitness. I'm equally as concerned with smoking, drinking, and all that shit as I am with keeping my body healthy. And I think people shouldn't overlook that. Like, as much as I act like I don't care about the statistics, I know this shit will probably make me sick later in life. But if I'm gonna have a bad habit, I might as well feel good and be healthy while I'm doing it. I encourage everybody else to do the same.